When I was young I was convinced that if you held onto a bunch of balloons you would go up in the air just like Mary Poppins. Ever since then they scared me. Phobic to tell the truth. So when I saw the girl lying down with the blue and pink balloons I had to scrabble around in my bag for medication and a paper bag. Only trouble is they were missing. Shit.

I was feeling myself get red. Hot. Sweaty. My legs turned to jelly. Trembly. Then suddenly around the corner walks a man holding a massive bunch of balloons. Hundreds it looked to me. Instead of fainting or having a heart attack I walked up to him and bought them all.

It was fantastic up there, floating around above everyone's heads. Sheer heaven to take the weight off my feet.