"I could never be a poet because I just can't seem to master the semicolon," I said.

"Not that hard to figure out, really," she replied. "Google it."

It wasn't that big of a deal to me. To be honest, I didn't even like poetry. Still, I Googled it anyway, and found out more than I ever wanted to know about the semicolon.

Later that night, I was hit by a semi; I had to have a section of my colon removed.

Uncanny, that was...