i bet i can beet u home shouted ben as he leapt past muddy puddles not caring about getting covered by whatevar was in his path "hay mum said that u have to look after me wait!!" cried lizzie bens little sister "you better keep up then" "oh your soo anoying" ben crashes through the kitchen door covering the floor in mud as mum gives him a look that ses i have jus spent the last half hour washing that floor and were is your sister i told u to keep an eye on her but mum i was only racing her home "i dont want to hear it now grab that cloth and get thoese dirty things off your feet "hahah u aare getting told off" ses lizze toung sticking out in her brothers direction "lizzie dont start"
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C
CatherineWilliams
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Galen about 16 years ago
I actually like the lack of punctuation. At first it confused, but in the end it flows well. We naturally know when to pause, based on the pace we know from life.