I rarely watch the news.

Except for that one time when I did turn on the news to catch breathless commentary of the desk crew as the news chopper puttered over the train tracks and there was a man standing on the tracks. The man wore black, his face draped in black and he held a sword in his hand--oh not just a sword, he had one of those Samurai Katanas aloft.

At least I think it was a Samurai Katana, my only experience with those was what I saw on "Kill Bill" and the katana letter opener I had that I was bullied into buying on the phone from some catalog that sold "Highlander" merchandise.

Aw, this fella was all out.

The news crew began to analyze the possibilities of this man's plight. What pain must he be going through?

These days, no one takes care of lonely people and tragic solo souls. The crime and pandemonium is too great to stop the world for a train that shall be soon coming to smash one single man with a Samurai sword. So no one will arrive but the ratings will be great.

Suicide tv is quite popular now and it's cheap and free. People do it on the news.

But I don't know.

This guy I didn't feel too sorry for. He's a hero right now in the blinding seconds before the train strikes. And in one split second, he will have survived the impact and he'll never know he died. In his mind forever hero.

I cheered and made popcorn.