The city was empty. That was the only remarkable thing about it. Its streets weren't paved with gold, it's shops sold the usual junk, it had poor districts and upper class suburbs.

The interesting thing was, the streets were empty, the shops had no employees and no customers and it's housing housed nothing. No one was there.

Well... there was one person there, there must have been, or how else could I be telling you this right now? Huh? Didn't think of that did you?

oh... right... CCTV... yeah, good point... sorry.

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"Aim for the torch."

"I'm trying!"

"We're gonna miss it."

"I know! I said I'm trying!"

"Ok, forget the torch. Try to land on, uh, her shoulder or something."

"The wind's too strong."

"How about her feet? The balcony? The plaza? ...The field?"

"This isn't my fault. No matter what happens, this isn't my fault."

"We're going to end up in the ocean, aren't we?"

"Probably. No, wait! I could just... Hmm. Yep. We're gonna land in the ocean."

"I don't like the ocean. It's wet."

"Shut up and deal with it."

"Plus all the cash in my wallet is...

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Okay, look. I had this idea that this was going to be a nice relaxing trip.

It was.

And we were going to come out here --

Yes.

And enjoy ourselves --

Yes.

And not have to deal with stress. Do you understand?

Yes, of course.

And now, what do you see?

What do you mean?

What do you see here?

I don't know... Trees, blue sky --

Stress!

Sorry?

Stress. It's stress. Every direction I look is stress.

Okay, look, you need to just take a breath. Remember what they said at the clinic. Deep breaths.

Stop it. I...

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It's not easy being funny.

People expect things of you. They come to you down in the mouth, looking for a laugh. Most of the time you can oblige them, but it's hard creating something from nothing. I'm not a music box that you can wind up and expect to hear a tune. At least say "please."

I guess it comes from watching too much television. Sitcoms really mold a kid who spends half his day on the couch. That, and a willingness to tell the truth to people's faces.

Anyway, it's easy to ask for a laugh. It's just...

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