-The thought of having to tell you my life story for forensic reasons, is quite barbaric to me. Is there any other way you can learn what you need to know?

-No. Go ahead. We need a summary of your life in order to rule you out as part of this crime. If we don't have that chronology, we can't do that. It looks very much like you are a perpetrator but this longer timeline will give us context for the short term timeline. Go ahead.

-{Sighs} Okay. As you know, I was born In Mount Auburn, NY. I lived...

"The McDonald's Arch Deluxe. Thee layers of disgusting terror."
The ad flashed by on the R31 bus, and I quickly completed it in my mind. Damn those people. As a vegan, I feel these ad execs should not be allowed to penetrate my air space.

Before I was strong-willed, such an attempt used to stand a chance at luring me from my modest, then-vegetarian diet.

Now, it had the chance of an earthworm in a swimming pool.

At loss of time and options, and very hungry for no apparent reason, however, I stepped into a nearby Burger King and ordered...

"This is a little weak on the nose, and blunt in taste. To put it mildly, I wouldn't serve this wine to my guests, nor likely drink it for pleasure." Those were the only words I have ever received, in written communique, as it were, from the famous wine critic Perry Daniels. It was also my first review as a vintner. Unfortunately, besides being in the show, it was also published in the Post. A shame. And great annoyance.

Because of this man, my start in vintering is in somewhat of a decay. I am looking in to brewmaster jobs...