I sprawl out across my book-strewn bed. The window is shut tight, the words on the page are swimming, and the beat of the neighborhood "get together" pounds at my scull. "William Shakespeare is by far the world's most widely known and appreciated playwright..." The textbook sits next to me, seeming to take up my entire bedroom. I can't focus on anything with all this stupid music. I reach for the mug of cold coffee sitting on my bedside table and pound it back. I grimace at the cold bitterness as it slides down my tongue. The clock reads 3:17am....
"Everyone has finals tomorrow, what the hell is he doing over there?" I yelled to Jake who was laying across the ground with textbooks and notebooks surrounding him. I curled my fist into a ball and hit the wall, hard 3 times. it's not like the person next door would be able to hear me over the sound of his blaring bass pumping through the divider.
"Maybe we should go to a different dorm. Or the library?" Jake suggested.
"I can't. I'm avoiding all the sorority girls because i'm supposed to have gone home this weekend because they want all...
"So, did your dog eat your homework?"
"No... You won't believe me so it doesn't matter anyway."
"You always have had a vivid imagination. Which I take pains to appreciate. Go ahead. Why weren't you able to prepare for the test?"
"I had been studying for thirty minutes - which is why I aced the radicands portion - when all the sudden there was a rumbling groaning sound from next door. I couldn't focus. I looked outside my window and across the alleyway was a huge green bass flopping about screaming."
"Uh?"
The bass pounded next door. pounded this door. pounded so loudly that louis put his head on his desk and pounded with it. he got up from his studying to give his next door neighbor a pound for a pound. and that's when his bed started shaking. Earthquake, he thought. and dived under his desk for safety. wait a minute, he thought, am i supposed to hide underneath the desk or a doorway. and then he noticed his desk wasn't shaking. just his bed. that is against the wall that he shares with his neighbor. then he heard the moaning...
Gregor couldn't focus. The sample problems in his textbook grew more and more indiscernible as the noises from next door grew louder and louder.
His neighbor was the problem. When Gregor had first moved into the apartment he didn't have a neighbor. Until one day he was awoken by a construction crew. Gregor's distracted mind drifted back to that morning. He remembered asking the construction worker.
-Hey, what's the story, man?
-Some bass with a trust fund is moving in. He's paying to waterproof the apartment so he can move in.
-A Bass? As in the freshwater fish? That's crazy...
He pounded his head on the wall to the rhythm of the heavy bass. Boom Boom Boom Boom Boom.
He'd attempted diplomacy already. Repeated knocks on the door had gone unanswered. No wonder: they probably assumed it was the music.
He'd attempted passive-aggressively turning his own music up to the max. Some good that does on a MacBook.
Nor did calling the neighbors help. The RA he'd summoned had joined the party.
3am on a Tuesday morning, in finals week. Deridda wasn't getting any easier. What would Deridda do? Hey thought. WWDD. Which was about the sound his forehead made...