When I reached end of the running trail in the woods, I ran into a gigantic zombie. Nearly wet my pants. Damn thing had to be seven feet tall.

I remembered that zombies bit skulls open and ate hot steaming brains. Made me wish I was wearing a football helmet. I started to run like hell in the other direcition.

"Wait," he hollered. "I'm thirsty. Got any ginger ale?"

"No. I only got a can of Pepsi."

"Good enough," he said. "Let me have it and I won't catch you and eat your brains."

I reached into my backpack and removed the can of Pepsi. "I'll throw it to you. Do you think you can catch it, considering you only have one arm?"

"No. Hand it to me."

When I extended it to him, he grabbed my arm and yanked it out of it's socket. Began to nibble on it as if he were eating corn on the cob.

THen he went for my brains. Damn lying zombie!