"You're here because someone recommended you to me. Someone who passed the test. Someone who promised you that you'd be a better financial trader."

The Banker nodded. "Peter. Pete sugg…"

"No names. No pack drill. Only one condition. If…"

"When… When, surely?"

"If… you pass the test, you have to recommend someone to go after you. Someone you think needs to be a better banker. And you DON'T tell them about the test."

"Agreed."

"Ok then. I'd hate to have to kill you." I smiled conspiratorially.

"During the day this park is full of dog walkers. And dogs. And shit."

"Yeah but…"

"No buts. You want to show you can and will do anything.…Anything… to succeed.…no matter the cost to others. Like me."

Mister Stocks-and-Shares grinned at me. "Oh yes."

"Find some shit. Then tread in it."

"Wha…?"

"Tread in it. Squash it. Smash it. Even knowing that you'll have to clean up the mess. We're alone. No one will see."

"These shoes cos…"

He stopped, seeing I meant it, then started looking round in the ferns. When he had finished he returned dishevelled but elated. He had even wiped it on his face for good measure. Impressive.

"And now I KNOW you are capable of anything."

The banker smiled triumphantly. "Just like you! Yeah!"

"Yes, just like me." Too bad. I had guessed that he would be an 'if' not a 'when'.

And so I too smashed up a piece of shit. Then cleaned up the mess. I love my job.