My eight-year-old brother couldn't sleep. He had watched a scary movie, and its main character was invading his thoughts.
"Is Dracula here?" he asked.
"No, he's back home in Transylvania," I assured him.
"Maybe he's visiting!"
In order to distract him and help him get to sleep, I came up with an idea.
"Let's make a mixtape of songs that will keep Dracula from visiting us."
I serenaded my brother with tunes that sent Dracula to all sorts of locations. The bloodthirsty count sailed away to Key Largo. He visited "Aruba, Jamaica ..." and the other exotic locations in the...
Every morning, the No. 7 bus drives down Cherry Lane. The kids waiting for the bus get splashed by a puddle whenever it rains. A homeless man sees it happen every day that it rains.
One rainy spring morning, the homeless man had enough. He walked right out in front of the bus before it could reach the corner.
The driver stepped out of the bus in a rage.
"Are you crazy? What are you doing?"
"Something. I'm doing something."
He raced around the bus driver and hopped into the driver's seat. He maneuvered the bus around the driver and...
The kids huddled around the tiny bundt cake, sipping juice from their plastic cups.
A lone candle burned at the center of the cake. The kids were trying to figure out how they were going to get a decent piece of cake.
"Don't forget to sing! Happy birthday to you ..." Tommy's mom began.
The kids sang half-heartedly. When they finished. Billy grabbed the cake and broke off a piece for himself. The other kids did the same, and everyone got a piece ... except the birthday boy.
His eyes filled with tears. The doorbell rang.
It was the pizza...
Friday is supposed to be a day to look forward to - TGIF, right?
Sammy had been dreading Friday all week because he had to go to the dentist. He wasn't afraid of cavities or drilling. He just didn't like his dentist, and there was only one in town.
Sammy walked into the office, waited his turn and took his place in the dentist chair. A new dentist entered the office. He looked like he was fresh out of dental school. Indeed, he had a fresh idea.
"In order for you to understand dental health better, we're going to switch....
There's only one country in this world. You would think that would be a recipe for peace. But haven't you ever heard of civil war?
No matter how much people try to stay united, some people will insist on being divided. It's just human nature. We don't conform. We rebel. So instead of focusing on similarities, some people have to classify themselves based on their differences.
That was the premise behind the first meeting of the PBS (Proud Bald Society). The members of the fledgling group filled the park, their heads shining in the mid-morning sun. Romulus Jones, their president,...
Giving in wasn't an option, but there was little else she could do.
"Ok, ok," she told the young galant with the sharp blade, "take whatever you want. Just don't hurt me."
The rascal had a look in his eye so sharp it could cut glass. "What I want, my lady," he said, drawing the space out between words to give them import, "is you."
The young woman's eyes widened, her ruby lips opened, but words failed her.
Reaching down, he made himself ready for his reward; then laid his hands upon-
her chastity belt.
Freed of the constraints of...
There was blood on my pillow. I flew out of bed as soon as I noticed it, but I could not remember where it had come from. I began to panic as I stared at it and tried to think about what I had done.
Was I attacked?
Was I drunk?
Was I a party in pillow-related homicide?
These questions whirled through my head until a sudden noise nearly knocked me over with fright. The phone was ringing. I worried about who might be calling, and simultaneously tried to collect myself. "Hello," I said, "Who ith thith?"
These words alone...
This was the month she was going to do it. Yes, really. This time.
Sitting down at the keyboard she faced the blank screen. First things first, time for coffee.
Now she could start. Come on, come on, come on. Where is my muse?
She strokes the keboard, searching internally for inspiration.
PUFFFF!
At first she thinks the computer screen is broken. Or maybe a virus has hijacked her software. She peers in astonishment.
A green face is forming in front of her eyes. At first the details are vague and hazy. Then it grows clearer. Yes, definitely a face....