Cupid said,
"Nobody knows or cares who I am."
"I'm just one of the pack."
Channeling Jan Brady, he added, "Everyone just cares about Rudolph, Rudolph, Rudolph!"
"Sure, he helped us out that ONE TIME, and now everyone can't stock singing about him."
"He wasn't even in 'The Night Before Christmas." It was On Dasher, On Dancer ... but Rudolph was still in the minors!'
Channeling Rodney Dangerfield, he added, "I get no respect at all. Even PRANCER had a movie made about him.
"I'm not even the most famous Cupid out there! It's that angel baby that shoots people...
Cindy yawned and stretched as she started her day. It was time to walk her pet octopus.
She pulled Ollie out of his protective shell, and they walked across the ocean floor.
"Good morning!" she called to Wally the Whale.
Suddenly, Wally decided to give Cindy and Ollie a ride by lifting them up, completely out of the ocean and depositing them on the sandy shore.
"Mom! Dad! Where have you been?"
"We've been right here. You took a nap."
"Yeah, I just had the craziest dream. I lived on the ocean floor, and I could breathe underwater and everything....
The bear was furious. He was knocking on doors, climbing stairs, and waiting for elevators, and he couldn't find Goldilocks' apartments. It was like one of those frustration dreams.
Finally, the door to Apartment 404 swung open. He peeked inside and found a photo of Goldilocks' family. All blondes. He was in the right place.
"Where's the porridge?"
No porridge. He had to make it himself, and it was too hot!
What about the chairs? They were out on the balcony. Were they too hard? Too soft? Who knows? It was snowing outside.
"I'm glad I can finally get to...
The woolly mammoth lined up for the next event in the prehistoric Winter Olympics: the 400 meter speed skating competition.
This wasn't going to be easy, but he had been practicing. He picked up some momentum and started gliding around the ice, as the other mammoths and dinosaurs cheered for him.
Despite his bulk, the mammoth was in the lead. The other contestants, mostly moose and elk, had wiped out on the ice.
Coming down the home stretch, victory was in sight.
Suddenly, a group of ice snakes slithered onto the track, determined to stop the mammoth's victory party.
The...
The city was empty, like the set of a sci-fi movie when the aliens have chased everyone away or a nuclear explosion had wiped out all life.
Usually, a hero would be walking through the streets, preparing to fight a giant opponent or searching to rescue some helpless victims.
But the only person walking the streets was Amanda. She was nine years old.
She woke up one morning to find that everyone was gone, without explanation.
So, she did what came naturally. She walked to the grocery store. It was only a couple of blocks down the street. The automatic...
The year was 1986. There wasn't anything to do, but there was everything to do.
When you're 11, life is simple. You go to school, and you try to get good grades. Food is taken care of, and you don't need a job.
What else is there to do? Go out and play. Mom never had to tell me to get out of the house. We had a lot of boys in the neighborhood, so I was always playing baseball, football, and basketball. Dad was a big kid at heart, so he often played with us.
Pro sports were also...
Mary wandered through Arlington National Cemetery. She was looking for her grandfather's tombstone. In a sea of perfectly aligned crosses, Grandpa's tombstone stood out.
That's because it was different: a crescent moon shape. Grandpa had earned the distinction of saving three of his comrades during World War II.
His heroics became known as the Moonlight Run. Wandering through the forest behind enemy lines, Grandpa had rescued three wounded soldiers, leading them out of the forest with only the light of a crescent moon to guide him.
Grandpa never had a movie like "Hacksaw Ridge" made about him, but Mary knew...