This is a masterful photo taken by Pulitzer Prize winning photographer Steven Kramer. Set in Baku, this is a 11th century castle, built by the Caroline Raanes the Great, to show off her wealth to the world. After its construction, streams of people came pouring in, including the renowned dictator, Matthew Brown, of Turkakhstan. At first, he tried to persuade Caroline to sell her the building, but his persistence could not persuade her to agree. He then organized his troops, and coordinated a military operation to take over this castle.
Potatoes. He was so sick of eat potatoes; mashed, baked, steamed, roasted, jacket, it didn't matter what topping or how much butter he slathered on, enough was enough. Not that there was any money for toppings or butter. Yesterday he'd gone to the shop at closing time and lurked just out of sight while the already reduced items were being further reduced. Once again, he was able to score a large bag of King Edwards for 29p. Excellent, he could make that last at least three days, maybe more if was able to get some free stuff out of the...
HI! This is a continum of the story: Collapse.
"Hello? This is 911, what is your emergency?" said the operator. "Hello? This is Hestan Gordio. I'm in the park and my friend Vive just collapsed into unconciousness. Please send medical help!" Hestan said into the phone. "OK, the ambulance will be there in a few minutes." said the operator before hanging up. 3 minutes later, the paramedics arrived and lifted Vive onto a stretcher. Hestan climbed into the ambulance and sat like a rock beside Vive the entire drive. When they got to the hospital, they ran her straight up...
"Something is wrong with the clock."
"...what?"
"Look at it."
20:70.
"That's not possible."
"Or it's ten past nine...?"
"No, because that would be twenty-one-ten. This is twenty-seventy." A pause. "Do you think it's odd, that we rely on technology so heavily?"
"Not especially. Everything is technology, really. Pen and paper, that's technology. Not advanced, but it's still technological. You see, externalising information - "
"Yes, yes, I've heard you lecture." She gave him a look. He'd clearly forgotten how they met.
He looked at her again, and she wondered if he had. "Of course you have. It's natural, for...
Lost in an amusement park, it slowly dawned on Mack that he was the luckiest child in the world--complete and total freedom from parental tyranny. He already planned on eating cotton candy for every meal. He would live in the storybook house near the magic beanstalk. No more homework, room cleaning, vegetable eating; it was a dream come true.
Mack made a beeline to the first ride on his agenda: The Serpent. This sleek steel coaster boasted six inversions, and a stomach-flipping double-dip that made him actually squeal with glee. He stepped into the queue, and awaited his turn.
The...
"Send it back," he said, his mouth shaped like a cruel stink.
"Why, whatsa matter with it?" I laughed.
"It's not a twist, that's a wedge. I didn't ask for a goddamn wedge. This is not an ice tea."
The busboy removed the drink, soon replacing it with another.
"Are you goddamn kidding me? This is the same thing. Do you know what a twist is?"
"Yeah," said the busboy, "it's what my fate has suddenly taken."
And he drank it down. Wedge and all.
"You are at the centre of all this, Meg. I know a love spell…" Pog said indignantly.
"Aye, ya do that, young Pog. How long was it since you came tripping to my door, full of admiration for a plough boy, and wanting him warmed?" The old woman chuckled as she pronounced 'warmed' with a long 'wahr'.
Both Pog and Tom blushed. The witch laughed again. "Not you, ya stupid ninny. HIM!" her pointed finger singled out Will, stood just inside the door.
The farmer gently turned his wife around. "What is all this?"
"The cake. The Apple cake I...
Lionel Richie was running naked down the street.
We saw him while driving to the donut shop. At first, I didn't think it was Lionel. Last time I saw him was grandma's birthday. He was there singing "Dancing on the ceiling." He actually tried dancing on the ceiling but then he fell down and hurt his little head. The police blamed it on gravity. But that's another story.
I had Mike stop the car. Then we both got out. We ran up alongside Lionel, who was running naked through Mrs. Benson's rosebushes. There were thorns embedded in his buttocks.
"Hey,"...
The results were in.
Her name wasn't even on the list. Not division A, not division B, not any of the special divisions . . . what the heck?
Okay, calm down, she thought, they let you take the test, so all the paperwork gets through. You can't fail the test, it isn't that kind of test, and they would've told you if something was wrong on your end, it was probably an administrative error. Right?
Who should she talk to? She had no idea. Okay, she could ask at the main counter. That's what it for, right? You don't...
It was the fall that surprised me the most. Not a quick dip and it's over-No, it was a slow, painful, frightening decline. Every little glance, every whisper, her giggle which carries across the room, would have me slipping deeper and deeper into this hopelessly unrequited attraction. My ordinarily suave nature just dissipates when she appears, and I turn into this bumbling old goon. It's awful. And it's still happening. As we speak, my heart flutters at the thought of her, and I feel my hold on things tanlgiloosen. I am falling. And there is no escape. I only hope...