Stupid, insignificant human! Does he not realise his days are numbered? As soon as he releases me from this cardboard prison, he will die! Now I just need to get him to let me out. Perhaps mewing pathetically will do the trick. I do hate to degrade myself in such a manner, but if needs must...
I tell you, my life was perfect before he came along. The Owners used to feed me, tickle me under the chin until I purred, and let me take over the Big Bed during the day. Sometimes even at night too. Mmmm. Those were...
"No, absolutely not!" Mama Tiger told her cub.
"But Moooooom! All the other cubs get to bring down a gazelle at my age!"
"I don't care what all the other cubs do. I'm not their mother; I'm yours. And the answer is no."
Timothy Tiger wandered off to sulk with his siblings, who were fighting over a piece of dark meat. Watching his brothers fight over a leg, he mumbled, "I bet your mother wasn't overprotective like mine."
He stopped and pondered this a moment. "Oh," he said in sudden realization, shrugged his shoulders and grabbed a leg bone from...
Gene Answer was a cool cat. He worked at a machine shop in Las Vegas. After ten years, he was laid off. No pension, no unemployment.
He had to leave his house and move into some hot-bed hotel to save his money. After that, he started to get pissed off. Eating balogna sadwiches on white bread was not his style.
Gene went to the local 7-11 dressed up in a ski mask and demanded all of their money. The clerk asked him if he wanted change. Gene simply brought out his wallet and demanded change for a $20.
The clerk,...
It was the last day.
General Richards was tired. Very tired. He had been walking for a long time, and there was still nothing in sight. No city of glass. Not even the path of golden bricks. They were nowhere to be seen.
He sat down in the dirt, even though none of the others were sitting, even though Eliza still had the energy to dance with her nurse. Of course she had the energy; she was the one they had all been giving all their food and water to. She was only a child. She held the future in...
In 1921, he flew from the Great Rift Valley all the way back to England where he discovered that it had been a mistake, he was meant to be in France, 1945. Time travelling isn't as accurate as all that.
Perhaps he would ought to do something a bit different for a change. Go back home. See what changes have been made. Would it be recognisable?
Jack the Ripper decided to return Whitechapel. 1888. London.
Hypnotised. It was one of those moments I'd never forget because I inflicted it all on myself.
Thought it would be an interesting experiment to see what would happen, never imagining that I'd be lying on the forest floor so many hours, luckily it wasn't days! Paramedics couldn't help, hospital doctors baffled until finally someone realised what was going on and called in a professional to snap me out of it.
What was even worse, I couldn't remember a damn thing afterwards. What place my mind had travelled to. All I recall was that I had wanted to try out...
The bully grabbed me and Billy by the collar. He started dragging us in the direction of what looked like a soccer goal, but had strange metal bars around it. It seemed as if there was already someone in there.
"Get in there, Squirts!" Chase growled. He kicked us in the goal like a soccer ball, except we didn't score him any points.
"So you're here too, I see. What did you do to him?" The strange girl said. "My name is Lara. I didn't give Chase my money when he asked. I should've just given it to him." She...
The dog told him to kill people. It wasn't like it was the first time either. Mr. Muffins had been telling Jim to kill people since he was but a pup.
At first it was the normal crazy things. Kill the president. Kill Madonna. Kill that guy who sells ice cream cones for 2 bucks down the street.
Really. Where was a 10 year old going to get 2 bucks for ice cream? The lemonade stand only earned him seventy five cents. And a bluegreen ball of yarn from Mrs. Patacki.
He managed to ignore the dog. Puppy voices were...
I woke around dawn, unable to sleep any longer. I wrapped the plaid blanket around my shoulders and head and climbed out the window. I walked through the small amout of dawn light filtering through the Brazilian pepper tree's enormous branches. I looked through the small peephole i had left for myself and immediately regretted ever climbing out that window. The reason: a 2 ton bear hurtling towards me. I felt unable to breathe. I tried to run, but my feet were rooted to the spot. as the bear drew closer, i said but one word: HELP!
They weren't Norwegian, they were Swedish. We bombed all hell out of them anyway.
That was ash, not smoke. Ash moves slower than smoke. Ash langours. Yes, that might have been soot, but it could have been bone.
In the mess at breakfast, we could heard a chirping through the settling din.
That wasn't a bird.